Cloughie – Back From The Grave?

Senior figures in the print and broadcast media have called for the resurrection of Brian Clough.

“To be honest, we don’t think there’s going to be enough to write about next season”, complained Henry Winter of the Daily Telegraph. “Scolari doesn’t speak English and looks set to confound us at every turn, Ferguson plays the power game too much and I don’t hold out much hope for Paul Ince providing a decent soundbite”.
Read the rest of this entry »

What The Papers Talk

Tottenham are preparing a double swoop on Spain by booking a two for one self-catering deal in Lloret de Mar AND a cut price package coach trip to Barcelona to visit the Sagra Familia. (Daily Express)

Roma have been linked with Manchester United duo Michael Stipe and David Lee Roth. (Daily Telegraph)

Read the rest of this entry »

Euro 2008 Fact Attack!

The press room in Vienna’s Ernst Happel stadium contains a life size nude bronze of the Daily Express’s Harry Harris.

Sepp – ‘Stop The Madness’

FIFA chief Sepp Blatter wants to see more participation at the top level of the game from manic depressives.

He says, “the game is overburdened with the mentally carefree and we need to address that.

Read the rest of this entry »

Top Flight Stars Keep Feet On The Ground

Premier League stars are among the least interested group in society when it comes to Yogic Flying.

Just 0.00000012% of top-flight players admit to regularly practicing the strange phenomenon, compared to the national figure which is just over 0.00000017%.
Read the rest of this entry »

The Funniest Names At Euro 2008!

Sports Offensive received the following press release. We felt that we should reproduce it in full…

Every International Football festival throws up names that tickle the funny bone. This year, the Department of Comedy at The University of Nottingham Trent has analysed all the names of players competing in the tournament and then created a definitive list of the most hilarious surnames at Euro 2008.
Read the rest of this entry »

Racing: It’s No-Go For Spazzimodo

The Jockey Club have released June’s list of newly-registered horse names that have been deemed unacceptable.

They are…
Read the rest of this entry »

Euro 2008 Fact Attack!

This year’s official goal keeping gloves have been supplied by hosts Switzerland and are manufactured from the underbelly skin of mountain goats.

Several pairs of gloves had to be thrown away when it was discovered that they contained udders.

Swans Lose Possession… Forever

Cash-strapped Swansea have had record signing Andy Bartram repossessed by the HSBC bank after they failed to keep up with repayments on the loan taken out to sign him.
Read the rest of this entry »