Ronnie O’Sullivan is the favourite to win the inaugural Pro-Animal Masters at Sheffield next month after he unveiled his playing partner, a white fox named Fitzcarraldo.
Paul Jewell has threatened to completely dismantle Derby County if there are any more abject performances from his team next season.
Former Wimbledon manager Joe Kinnear has revealed he’s been invisible since January of last year.
All internet poker has been temporarily suspended after it was revealed that 97% of all online players are in fact a robot owned by Steven Spielberg.
Pigeon racing has a new star – Simon Hepplestone, a 42 year-old former lecturer (left).
Ian Hatches Plans For Ref Respect
Radio 5 Live are looking for potential applicants to be a caller on their prestigious 606 phone in.
You will have at least three years experience of annoying the living shit out of colleagues, friends and family with your half-baked, lobotomised opinions on football.
A loud foghorn like voice and comical local accent would be beneficial, as well as a mobile phone that doesn’t work properly.
To apply please write a paragraph of incoherent babble starting with the phrase “Hello Alan, I’m on the M1 and I’d just like to say…”