Beijing Long Jump In Peril

Olympic organisers in China are in a state of panic as an import ban on Plasticine means long jump foot marker boards cannot be properly filled.

For some years, China have banned all importation of the soft material as they tried to perfect their own version. Unfortunately, their chemical experiments failed, resulting in a vast, amorphous green blob of sticky sculpting clay rampaging through the streets of Beijing.

As well as devouring many screaming city dwellers, Olympic officials are now worried that they may have to fill their long jump boards with a flour and water paste.