It’s Biscuit Time In The Prem

The Premier League has decided to introduce their own concept of time for the 2010-2011 season.

Instead of months, days, hours and minutes, the season will be measured in biscuits. “This is a natural development in our attempts to create a unique environment to develop fresh marketing opportunities for potential sponsors,” revealed Chief Executive Richard Scudamore.

“We feel fans will be comfortable with the idea that a goal will be scored in the seventeeth McVities Digestive of the first Burton’s Jammie Dodger. The transfer window will now happen in the Tunnock’s Wafer and players will enjoy a break from the game during the Nestle Blue Riband Nine Pack.”