Ticket price shock – It’s almost 3,000 times dearer at Chelsea than at Blackpool

Fans have reacted with horror at the news that Chelsea’s 2010/11 season tickets will be 2,825 times more expensive than those at Blackpool.

Supporters’ spokesman Kevin Lee Worthy took time out from licking envelopes and avoiding getting a proper job to tell us, “This news is another dagger in the heart of the real, working class football fan. The man with a flat cap on his head, a hole in the sole of his boot and a brain filled with all manner of unsuitable thoughts about his young nephew.”

“It shows again that football is no longer the game of the people but just a platform for the likes of the Leon Brittans and the Tim Rices of this world to get together and sip frappacinos together.”

The figures came from a survey carried out by Tefal and compared Chelsea’s Executive Deluxe Season Package with Premier League newcomers Blackpool’s Budget Ditch Ticket

For £113,000 a season, Chelsea supporters can watch the game from inside one of four giant glass oysters that dangle from the corners of Stamford Bridge. A nine-course banquet is on the menu along with a full secretarial service, including hand shandies.

Conversely, for just £40 a season, Blackpool fans get to sit in a ditch outside Bloomfield Road (seen left) with no view of the action and have live match commentary barked at them by a knife-wielding thug.

Catering consists of being shown a photograph of the leftovers from Chelsea’s Executive Deluxe Season Package clients’ previous fixture.